It starts to dawn on me that my life is near the end. Oh, I might have 20 more years, even.....but the end is in sight and could be a lot sooner than that.
All the things that matter to me now -- all the little and big things, from which shoes to wear to how/whether to patch up a broken relationship, will mean nothing.
It's a terribly hard thing to get your head around. Daunting. Depressing. And of course, reorders your priorities. Does it really matter the slightest bit, for instance, whether I eat one cookie or two?
Beneath and behind all this, I miss my mother so much and also can't get my head around the idea that she is gone from me and from this world forever.
To end on a less sad note though, CARPE DIEM, my friends (if any are reading). Seize the day, and make the most of all our time here. To quote a song I used to like: "A good day is any day that you're alive." Amen.