Oh, there are so many things.......like that when someone dear dies, a bit of me dies too. When mom went, there were many times when I thought, "Just take me now, too." How inconceivable it is that she will never be back with me.
Near the end of her life, just a week before the stroke that silenced her forever, she said "I'll always be with you." I have tried so, so hard to truly feel that, to have it be more than words. And I don't come very close, ever.
The best I can do is be grateful to have had such a wonderful mother for 62 years of my life. It's not too hard to be present to that blessing.